Opinion: Beware Bergen's Revisionists of History

In which His Majesty Osman Shahanshah of the Kingdom of Babkha deplores recent attempts to rewrite the past and fondly reminisces about a golden age of micronationalism.

The President of that entity which refers to itself as the Federal Republic of Cyberia, but which we all know to be the latest manifestation of Jacobus' near decade-long smear-campaign against the legitimate Virtual Commonwealth of Cyberia, did voice, at the Bergen Conference, an aside concerning the complex diplomatic situation that occurred in Morovia during the winter of 2001-2002:

"Does anyone remember the machinations carried out at the expense of Morovia? The infant Republic would not have had to kow-tow to Babkha for protection against the giant that was Tymaria, or accept the restoration of a monarchy they did not want."

In doing so, he did repeat a version of history as the Digas and Scott Alexanders of this world would have it, that either the Babkhans (as ever it seems) were entirely to blame or else both sides were as bad as the other. This is blatant poppycock.

When news of the demise of King Vincent's Kingdom reached the halls of Babak the Great it was my honour to be sent to make a reconnaissance of the failed state. The great tragedy of the Morovian forums in the absence of any meaningful central authority was that it was so badly structured and insecure that anyone could pretend to be anyone (as indeed we saw with the Tyrant Diga's lamentable attempt to pass himself off as 'King Vincent IV'.

Now, in the milieu by which we were confronted, many forces were clearly at work, including various scavengers of legitimacy not entirely unfamiliar to President Jacobus himself. Then of course there were the Tymarians who were looking there because we were there and there were some scuffles provoked on their part by the militarist Atteran desire to spark a wider war between the Kingdom of Babkha and Tymaria. The Atterans were at that time effectively the military wing of Tymaria, accounting for little aside from bellicosity. It was all in all a most wretched scene.

However, from amongst all the ruined edifices of Morovia there was at least found one gleaming gem, and that gem was not the Republic of Morovia, but rather Bob Kee, a Malaysian political activist of character and distinction, and of rare organisational ability. It was he alone who held the head of the 'infant Republic' above water. It was he alone who gave it grace and dignity, and it was his common sense and competence that above all else recommended him to us as the one coherent voice amongst the cacophony there.

Indeed there again, such was his good judgement and plain common sense that he and Shah Babak had an immediate meeting of minds. From thereon, a fruitful policy of engagement was born, marred only by the ham-fisted efforts of Tymarian Military Intelligence to infiltrate the Republic. The Republic, however, was illegitimate and it was Bob Kee's insistence rather than our own that led to that country returning to the honourable institution of monarchy.

Regrettably the true King Vincent was not to be found and Diga's manifestation as 'King Vincent IV' was contemptable. At a loss then, Mr Kee arranged to have the President crown as King in the interim, however long that should be. As such, Morovia rose in the estimation of all nations, save for Tymaria and those other petulant spirits who had been cheated of their mischief by the end to the chaos.

In the end, of course, it was all to end happily. Diga's antics in Morovia had come to the attention of the true King Vincent, apparently the third of that name, and happy was the occasion of his restoration.

In the end both Kingdoms benefitted and no true Morovian ever lost out from the restoration. Indeed Bob Kee also went on to become Abbas Namvari of Babkha, and in that capacity was to usher in almost single-handedly one of the most glorious chapters in that nation's history - the faint echo of which we still hear today in the Abbas Namvari-Charles Beard FNORD award.

- His Majesty Osman Shahanshah